Desiree Gaither is a young woman who turned her life around with help from the Discovery Program at Providence Alaska Medical Center (read the cover story from the Spring 2006 issue of Healthy Alaska).
She wrote this poem while living at McAuley Manor, a program of Catholic Social Services. We hope that it may be an inspiration to other young women like Desiree.
"Only Me"
by Desireé C. Gaither
My childhood wasnt easy, and sometimes I couldn't see.
I was blind to all the pain and suffering that was put on me.
I was comfortable with the chaos and adapted to abuse.
When I got the nerve to change things, a small voice said "What's the use?"
I blocked out the memories that I didn't want to know.
Turns out that was the only way that I would ever grow.
When I started to remember all that had happened to me.
I befriended alcohol and the net was my security.
I made a new identity, and hid myself from sight.
When I wasnt in my room all I ever did was fight.
I started wearing make-up, and I started going out.
But my make-up was all black and I really wasn't out.
I went to Charter and I lied my way through.
All I thought I wanted was to be with what I knew.
I went to Discovery, and decided to be real.
I needed to wake-up, to learn how to heal.
They brought me to Providence, a residential place.
I learned what it was to feel, and got to know my face.
I learned to be assertive, and how to let things go.
Something I still have to work on, is letting my feelings show.
I have a long ways to go, but the end seems so near.
I look to my graduation with anticipation laced with fear.
But just because I graduate, it doesn't mean I'm done.
It's simply the first battle I have won.
I know I'll never be finished. I'll always have work to do.
But I know whatever comes at me, I'll find a way through.
I can ask for help now, when things are getting rough.
And no matter what happens, I will always be ENOUGH!
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