
FAQs | GLOSSARY | STAFF | TCHAP HOME
Children’s Understanding of Death:
5-9 years
• Death seen as possible, but not for them, only for others
9-11 years
• Death now may include them
• Child may understand irreversibility of death
• Death becomes more real, final, universal, and inevitable.
• Child can differentiate between living and non-living.
• Child may show interest in biological aspects of death and details of funeral.
Possible Related Behaviors:
• Crying
• Anxiety
• Headache
• Abdominal pain
• Separation anxiety at time of going to camp, away to school
• Denial of death
• Hostile reactions toward deceased
• Guilty, blame someone other than self.
• Poor grades
• Day dreaming
• Lack of attention
• Loss of manual skills
• Withdrawal
• Fear of continuing friendship bonds, might lose friend
• Try to fix things and find solution to death
• My fear will die at same age
• Display similar symptoms of deceased person
What You Can Say/Do:
• Suggestions for preschool age child may also apply for the schoolage child.
• Explain that everyone has different reactions to death at different times.
• Give permission to cry through words and examples, let them know its ok not to cry.
• Give an honest explanation for the death.
• Encourage attendance at funeral as a final ceremony to say goodbye, but understand if child chooses not to go.
• Be a good listener
• Let them know their feelings are very important.
Select from the links below for more information about specific age groups:
• Infants
• Preschool
• Schoolage
• Adolescents
Source: University of Nebraska Medical Center Child Life Department and Munroe-Meyer Institution, Copyright 1986. 5th reprint March 1999. For copies contact the Child Life Department (402) 559-6775.
If you have further questions or concerns, please contact us:
• Mother/Baby Unit: 261-4892
• Newborn Intensive Care Unit: 261-3614
• Pediatric Intensive Care: 261-3133
• Spiritual Care Department: 261-3275
• Social Worker on-call: 562-2211
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